“Take your stinking paws off me, you damn dirty ape”

We’re heading up to Shimla with Miss Julia. This is a fun trip for several reasons.

First we fly to Chandigar. As I enter Delhi domestic airport, the check in clerk looks at my Australian passport and makes a face which I understand to mean “boy, have we just stuffed you at the cricket big time”.

Then when we land, we still have a 5 hour drive up some winding mountain roads with Mr Kapur (Memsahib’s #2) as the pace car. Rishi does his best to keep up which necessitates some overtaking on the outside of people who are already overtaking. Nail biting, stomach churning stuff and we have to take a few breaks to let our internals settle down.

During a break for lunch a local monkey attempts to steal Miss Julias handbag. Their bag snatching would have worked if it wasn’t for those pesky drivers who raise the alarm and scare them off. Temporarily at least, as they then turn and starts hissing at us and advancing which prompts everyone to dive into the cars and secure the windows.

After the drama of the primate crime spree, we’re back on the road. Suddenly lunch seems to be a badly thought out action. Mr Kapur may be a man who appreciates the finer things in life, but he has missing his calling as a Delhite taxi driver.